Hey guys, it’s us again! So, I bet most of you heard our first story, right? If you haven’t…well, check it out now. Otherwise you won’t understand anything, cause we aren’t offering re-introductions. [Hey, don’t poke me dude. What? Seriously? We have to do this whole thing again? My god…fine.] So, it’s been two years since…that last quest. The one…where CL died. ‘Scuse me for a sec.
Okay, I’m back, I don’t like talking about CL. Is that okay? Whatever. I’m Barefoot Icicle. I’m seventeen and a half, and my sister is fourteen. Her name’s Slippery Icicle, but she goes by Slip. I go by B.F, which I am just realizing is almost an exact abbreviation for boyfriend. Hopefully only SD will notice-Spotted Dragon, my girlfriend. Slip’s dating this guy named Speedy Tomato, whose parents we saved on our quest, Slippery (Slip, same as my sister) Tomato (his mom), and Friendly Tomato (his dad). Our family friend, Nameless UnDEFiNed, lives nearby with her parents and her cousin, Fierce Popper (who’s sitting next to her), and is going out with my friend Gentle Spinner. Our parents are named Sticky Icicle (our dad) and Cuddly Icicle (our mom). That guy in the back is Invisible Axe-you’ll meet him later. And then there’s White Carrot-we call her Monslivs3. She’s pretty cool. That’s good for introductions, right? [Shut up, Slip. Wait until it’s your turn to talk.] So, this time a lot of us are here to recount the story. Not all of us are willing to, but…well, brace yourself. You’re gonna be here a while.
It all started seven months ago-October 15th. I blinked my eyes twice, then fell back asleep. Yeah, that went great. Two minutes later, the alarm clock beeped and I groaned. I took a swing at the snooze button, missed, and fell out of bed. Smooth. I took a couple hops towards the bed and grasped my peg leg, which was leaning against the bed post. I used it almost like a walking stick for a little bit before putting it on and balancing. I sleepily removed my pajamas shirt and groped around my wardrobe for a fresh one. Then I heard some snickering, and someone in the closet burst out laughing. Two someones, actually. Maybe even three. I grabbed a shirt, quickly pulled it on, and said “Slip, get outta my closet.”
She came out, wide-eyed and innocent-looking. “It was your girlfriend’s idea,” she said, then laughed. SD walked out of the closet, also laughing, and said “No way, I had no part in this.” I gave her a look. “Well, you were doing it.” And then the third person tumbled out, cracking up on the floor. Speedy.
I rolled my eyes. “Seriously? C’mon, guys. Not funny.” Slip’s smile vanished. “Why do you think we were hiding in there?” I had no answer.
Then she smiled again, and SD stepped up. “It’s your birthday, you moron,” she said. Then she hugged me. It was my turn to crack up. I had forgotten my own birthday? Wow, I was stupid. I pulled away and smiled. “Thanks, guys. Could you head down? I’ll join you in a sec.” They nodded and ran down the stairs, talking quickly. I heard SD ask Slip if her present would be cool, and there was a silence for about five seconds before Slip answered, “You’re kidding me, right? You know him even better than I do. He’ll love it.” Then SD sighed. “Thanks, Slip. I was worried.” Then I couldn’t hear their voices anymore.
I closed my door and slowly walked over to the journal of Cuddly Lion. I picked it up, stroking my finger along the cover. There were the words-“I’m sorry.” Signed by R.F. CL’s master. I sighed and pocketed the book, then grabbed my phone and walked down the stairs.
When I got down, I was surprised by how many people were there. GS, Nameless, Speedy, SD, and Slip (of course). And then for the adults, there were GS’s parents, Nameless’s parents, Speedy’s, and mine. Then I noticed a guy in the back. “Hey, B.F,” he muttered. “Long time, no see.” He groaned and walked towards the front of the room in a funny fashion, as though every step hurt him. He got to me and smiled, and set his hand on my shoulder. “You’ve grown taller, boy. Soon you’ll be as tall as your uncle!” He grinned, as though imagining that. He tousled my hair. I was too shocked to push his hand away. This guy was my uncle? I looked at my mom. She nodded. “He’s my brother. He hasn’t seen you since you were a baby. His name’s Invisible Axe, but he’s Uncle Axe to you.” I looked at her. “So your real name was Cuddly Axe?” That broke the silence as Uncle Axe began to chuckle. “Got your mother’s wit, you do. You’re gonna be a great adult. And, hey,” He nudged me in the ribs and pointed at SD. “She’s a keeper, buddy.” He laughed and sat down in an armchair and I noticed a Purple Heart on his lapel. I almost said something but Mom flashed me a warning look. She pointed to his knee, which was peppered with four bullet holes. I remember feeling sickened by it. He quickly saw me staring at it and pulled down his shorts. “None of your business, laddie,” he growled.
I backed off and we started to dig in to the cake. After the party, Uncle Axe stayed behind and looked us over. “I haven’t seen you in years, B.F. And I’ve only seen pictures of your little sister.” I nodded. “Uh-huh.” But I was too busy intently staring at his knee. What else could I do? Then I remembered how bad it felt when people stared at my peg leg. Not fun.
Anyway, I barely heard when Uncle Axe said “Kids, I’ve got an announcement.” Slip, being the alert nimrod [don’t judge me Slip, you can be a nimrod sometimes. Ow! That hurt!] she is, lifted up her head and asked “What?” Uncle Axe grinned and said “I’m coming to live with you guys!” My parents smiled.
Well, at least now I would get a chance to observe his past a little more.